How To Coach Yourself

The title of this blog post may not sound sexy. But the tool I share with you inside may change your life.


So, I hope you'll read this blog post anyways, despite the not-so-sexy title. 

Ok. Let's dive right into How To Coach Yourself.

There's 3 steps you can take everyday that'll take you 10 minutes or less. I personally take these steps everyday in my own life and I recommend them to all my clients, too. 

If you start doing these 3 steps everyday, you'll notice amazing things happening. Like, a heightened self-awareness, self-acceptance, and empowerment. And you'll start to increase your confidence and strengthen your beliefs that you can make anything happen in your life. 

Seriously. It's that amazing. 

Here's the 3 steps. 

Step 1: Write Down Your Thoughts

Find a quiet place where you can really focus on this. A place where you won't be interrupted for about 10 minutes. 

Take out a piece of paper and pen OR open a google doc. And start writing. 

Write down everything you're thinking in that moment. Let all the thoughts pour out of you without judgement. Write, write, write.

And when you think you're all done, ask yourself, "What else?" 

Keep writing until you feel like you've gotten everything down. Then, stop. 

Step 2: Pick One Thought & Do A Model

Pick one of the thoughts (doesn't matter which one). And do a model on it. 

This is where the fun begins....

Now, you may be wondering what a model is. 

A model is an amazing tool you can use to coach yourself. It was created by my coach and mentor and I'm extremely proud to be teaching it to you now. 

The model has 5 components. 

  1. Circumstances (C)
  2. Thoughts (T)
  3. Feelings (F)
  4. Actions or Inactions (A)
  5. Results (R)

The model shows us that there are circumstances in the world. Which are pretty much everything outside of ourselves. Like other people, the weather, the number on the scale, etc. Circumstances are facts. 

We have thoughts about our circumstances. Our thoughts are our opinions only. 

Our thoughts cause our feelings. Our feelings cause our actions or inactions. Which produce our results. 

So, let's say the circumstance is that the scale says 175 pounds when I stand on it. This is a fact because it can be proven. I can step on the scale and see 175 pounds. 

There's no emotion about this fact...until someone has a thought about it. 

Some people would step on the scale and see 175 pounds and think it's awesome. 

Other people would think it's horrible. 

In this example, let's say 175 pounds is thought of as a bad thing. Let's say I'm thinking some self-defeating thoughts about weighing 175 pounds. So, I'll pick one of those thoughts and plug it into the model. 

Let's say the thought I pick is, "I'll never lose weight." 

I plug it into the model. Then, I ask myself what I feel when I think that. Then, I ask myself what I do (or don't do) when I feel and think that. Then, I ask myself what my result is. 

It looks like this. 

C: The scale says 175 pounds when I stand on it 
T: I'll never lose weight. 
F: Defeated
A: Don't follow my weight loss plan 
R: Continue to weigh 175 Pounds and not lose weight 

The model shows me how thinking this way is causing me to feel defeated. Which is causing me to not follow my weight loss plan. And it's producing a result I don't want in my life...continuing to weight 175 pounds. 

Step 3: Make A Choice

Now, the most important part is to review the model you create and make a choice.

Am I going to judge myself and use this model to make myself feel even worse? 

Or am I going to be curious about myself and use this model to discover more about myself so I can ultimately get the result I want? 

My recommendation (of course) is to use it for self-discovery. I mean, what kind of life coach would I be if I told you to judge yourself and make yourself feel even worse?! 

If you decide to use it for self-discovery, I strongly suggest you start by doing a model and being curious about it. Live in the state of self-awareness for awhile. Don't try to change your thought or feeling right away. Just get to know yourself. 

When you're ready and you truly understand yourself, you can decide whether or not you want to keep thinking that way or not. 

The Wrap-Up 

I recommend you coach yourself everyday for the rest of your life. 



For the rest of your life. 

It'll be the best investment of your time and energy.

Listen, you could be the biggest self-development guru in the world, and you'd still need to coach yourself everyday for the rest of your life.

That's if you're a human on this planet. And you have a human brain. 

Which I know you do! 

Coaching yourself everyday for the rest of your life will be amazing. 

In 10 minutes or less, you can write down your thoughts, pick one thought & do a model, and make a choice. If you do this just once everyday, you'll be amazed. And if you really like it, start doing it more than once a day. You'll be even more amazed. 

There's no time like the start now. 

Your circumstance is this blog post. What are your thoughts about it?

Write down your thoughts. Go! 

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